journal 3

☆ aug 14th 2:41pm



me

btw i've been coding a bit recently and playing with utau but i think i ruined the mix for this one. *_8 it's ok. i think i'm going to go read a little and hopefully draw today idk you guys it's hard to do anything but everything gets done by the end of the day. and furthermore i keep wearing short skirts to get mens attention and it nevar works but i don't get out enough for it to work

doodles

☆ aug 9th 10:42pm



chii daraakeee no ai dake o kudasaiii fuuaaanndeeee why does microsoft keep asking me to sign in you know it's me you literally have my pc user profle icon loaded. barabara ni kudakesō

☆ july 30th 10:44pm

i took the pleasure of watching inu-oh finally, it was incredible!! my first time watching something masaaki yuasa directed!!! i find that very special...



it was the type of film that made my jaw hang open in awe at many moments, i was certainly impressed. the animation was refreshingly beautiful, i loved the environments, and expressiveness of dear tomoari & inu-oh, (avuchan's performance rocked holy shit. both of them, though) and i thought the overall story told was fantastic. the mix of historical and contemporary elements was just captivating. i laughed and smiled and gasped throughout but the ending was so... well i won't spoil it but it tugs at the heartstrings.

it reminded me a little of ongaku: our sound, another delightfully offbeat animated film about music. that one is way more comedic though of course

anyway that was probably the coolest queer biwa rock opera i'll bear witness to in my lifetime. let them sing their heike songs, damn it!

☆ july 28th 7:11pm

i saw 1 person insinuate zabuza is the type of political reformist that just really hates the current government and would advocate for better living conditions which is funny to me since as mizukage he would probably be as much of a capitalist warmonger as yagura if not worse were he clever enough to orchestrate it. he would make it worse U know that.

i think that he thinks he knows how the world works or should work and wants to see things get crushed because of that. i don't give him credit for like anything you show me this dude who failed his attempt at a coup and ran off with his tail between his legs and then he got tired and died how am i supposed to feel about that. dumbass...

for a hot minute i didn't even believe that people were referring to him when they call mangetsu and/or suigetsu the second coming of the demon because how is he more proficient than any of the other swordsmen.

this is stupid because the whole point is that he IS just some guy.and it's like surprise everyone is just some guy. but i don't think we get to say he was a good person he just sucks at being evil a little more than others

also disclaimer obviously it doesn't make sense to try to fit him into the timeline or compare him to yagura etc. when these things just did not exist yet but i like to have fun. and i care about this character a disproportionate amount. i bully out of my passion for hyperbole, and love

tune in next time for more echo chamber meta

☆ june 30th 6:47pm

i wanted to update here that over the weekend my laptop's motherboard bit the bullet, (it was having issues for a while but i really thought it was only that i needed a new charging cord... >_<)

and so i had to get a new pc. i was really deflated the whole day i received the news because i didn't know until the afternoon whether or not i had lost everything on that hard drive. BUT as luck would have it, not only did that not happen, *everything* transferred perfectly onto this new one. it's a lenovo, and it's ridiculously lightweight and sleek, same size as my old one, but with way more storage and RAM.

i honestly really love it..!! i feel so grateful that it worked out the way that it did and that everyone was so helpful and kind...

i am running win11 now and everything on my site looks so small kuku. i'd really like to update the art galleries with new pics but gosh, i've been so tired of dealing with files.

i was also working on a new page before all of this so maybe i'll get around to finishing that too. it is a beautiful summer, i'd like to take some photos of all the wild foxglove but it's all i can do not to just lay down outside and fall asleep in the sun instead.

i hope we can all have a nice week or month or year
P.S. BACK UP YOUR FILES!!!

☆ may 21st 12:41am

unaffiliated 7 was today as i posted about and it was really fun. i love those guys they blow it out of the water every time in terms of hahrd fucking tunes and happy energy.

this october. be there or be square(pusher)

in other music news i uploaded a random song off a cd i downloaded just for accessibility, i've had it for a while, but i'd never visited the associated site before and it's a fun little peek into events that transpired a decade ago.


it was interesting reading one of the dj's (current, 2023) blogposts about hosting a show at a school that had been shut down!
we'll find any way to be together, yeah?


☆ may 15th 2:44pm

some-thing i regret is not learning the proper way to format a website and have it scale for mobile + more screen sizes from the jump.

it's a selfish way of coding, not considering anyone else. it was so frustrating figuring out html for the first time that while i was trying to get a handle on things i didn't want to think about optimizing it for a platform i don't use.
(i don't own a mobile phone.)

(on a personal note, i have always felt like no matter how hard i try i am actually incapable of learning new skills in anything other than a half-assed way, like a curse. this is not an acceptable way to think because just because something is difficult doesn't mean i can simply give up. it's important to put effort into learning the right way to do things, and accomplish them to the best of my ability regardless of my erroneous idea that i merely "can't.")

but i do really like it here and the peace of mind it gives me

get a little better every day

☆ april 23rd 9:23pm



the other day i took the snowflakes off my window and changed my browser theme so no more happy snowing world it's happy springtime world wow i really want this to end as if there's a clean conclusion



sometimes it is scary googling anything pertaining to these pricks i try not to but like all the suggested search reuslts are. i don't know. it's not exactly triggering but it's like woah! woah now. easy (i'm talking to an anxious horse)

i get tired of it as if they don't somewhat exist to be examined in relation to each other


lol

anyway malice mizer is really good right and i didn't even know that before

☆ mar. 30th 6:25pm

don't feel like much of a person today so maybe i'll type a little. lately i have been enjoying playing yakuza 0, which i'd like to be doing right now, and at night i've been reading a chapter or two of dorohedoro..

i feel like i could live in q hayashida's art which is why i read it so slowly; it's like savoring a decadent dessert. her creativity continues to intrigue and surprise me although i've thought for a long time that the setting of the comic feels so catered to my specific interests that it would likely be a familiar place to reside, and it is, and i find it relaxing in that way.

her bold rugged inking has such a masterful attunement to the detail of texture and form, it's so beautiful.. i get excited and happy that i even get to look at it. the writing itself is delightful and funny. ebisu and fujita are incredibly amusing i'm glad fujita is actually part of the ensemble because i was smitten since the chapter he marched up to the door with that huge rifle slung around his scrawny neck lol like who the fuck is this guy. i also like en for reasons that are predictable, and KAIMAN.

(or maybe not predictable i'm not sure that anyone including myself can predict what kind of guys i like)


☆ mar. 12th 2:51pm

(cleaning an inordinate amount of blood out of carpet) wow this is just like ichi the killer

☆ feb. 2nd 8:02pm

what do you do when you only want to listen to the same 2 my bloody valentine songs again and again well apparently i can do that


haku to look at i got from somewhere special

i did do most of the stuff i needed to anyway and i even took a walk
but i didn't want to draw at all which is probably good because i keep making weird pictures o_*

☆ jan. 30th 4:18pm

getting really into a book or a tv show is the same as falling in love where suddenly every song becomes about it and it's funny because you'll end up linking the most unrelated random shit just by consequence of liking them at the same time

my favorite lemon twigs concept album about a monkey going to school IS NOT ABOUT ##### ######







my obito amv

☆ jan. 17th 2:22pm

happy smiling world i had a nice morning talking to my mom about linguistics and then i took a walk and my packige arrived while i was out



i'm reading a lot of books already but i'm excited to read it and to have it

☆ dec. 25th 2:18pm



i might take this down later because it has my real voice in it but for now enjoy

☆ dec. 13th 4:30m

when i first watched haibane renmei i didn't really understand why rakka was deemed sin-bound just because she like. didn't feel capable of talking to people about what was hurting her? that she carried bad things in her past, and felt alone? like how does that make someone cursed if none of that is really one's fault but nowadays ohhhhhhhhh. ohhhhh. i see now

i love that show though i'm glad i got to watch it


☆ oct. 28th 8:44pm

Nobody cares about this except me although I guess what this blog is for but man the Krieg dlc for Borderlands 3 still makes me miserable.

Namely the OST, Finishing Move did NOT have to go so hard on it. The distorted piano synth at 0:37 in Sapphire Starlight gets me physically sick.
A Goosed Caboose?
Don't even start. I should maybe replay BL3 but I'm scared because it's bad

☆ sept. 28th 2:04pm

hi :-)